My (28F) mother (65F) makes me edit all of our photos

2021.11.27 16:39 cptnspaceboyfriend My (28F) mother (65F) makes me edit all of our photos

Sorry I’m advance for the long post.
My mother struggled with severe alcoholism and depression my entire childhood, not to mention we were below the poverty line. It was a rough time and we had a strained relationship, but she has recently (past 2 years) gotten sober and we have rebuilt a lot of what was lost. She is a good person at heart.
My mom turned 65 recently and although she is still beautiful, aging has been hard on her. She was a stunner in her youth but years of alcohol and tanning have taken their toll. This has led to her consistently asking me to alter her photos. At first I didn’t mind - she’d request just using a phone app to adjust small things like a bruise, stray hair, lighting, etc.
Fast forward to Thanksgiving, which is what prompted me to make this post. It was a great day with a lot of sweet moments which my SO documented with pictures. I don’t typically use social media but my mom really likes using Facebook. She got a 7 day ban and was upset she couldn’t post the Thanksgiving photos. I offered to do this for her since I knew it was important to her. I sent her all the photos that were taken so she could “approve” which ones she likes (this has been a theme for a long time, she tends to like very few). She sent back what she was ok with, but made notes to the things she wanted changed. In one photo she wanted to me basically completely restructure her neck area. I said fine and did it (which I understand is enabling the behavior but it is still hard to say no to my mom, and the picture in question was a very sweet candid moment that I would like to keep). She approved the edit and asked for a few more things, to which I complied. She said I could post them so only she could see it and after she approved that I posted the correct photos I could make it public. I don’t have the Facebook app anymore but I can post through the Messenger app. I did so and selected custom but it didn’t go through and posted publicly , which I didn’t realize until people started liking it.
I then got a very angry text from my mother about this. She essentially said it’s said and done and I asked her what photos were included that were “wrong”. She sent back a few photos with red circles around things like a small crease in her arm, and the top of her foot visible, things literally no one would notice, and said I didn’t fix it right. I deleted the post even though she told me not to. I told her I loved her but she looks how she looks and I really wish she would work through her self-esteem issues. I also pointed out that she takes and posts (objectively) awful photos of me all the time and I don’t mind because the moment is more important than how I look. We have since talked but that hasn’t been brought up again.
So what I’m asking is, how do I help my mother regain her self-esteem? I understand editing at her request is enabling her and I won’t be doing it when she asks again. It’s just concerning me because this behavior has gotten more and more excessive. For example we had a photoshoot planned soon and she sent me a link to this product from Amazon that is essentially little tape strings to pin her face back. I am honestly at a loss for what to do. I tell her she is beautiful all the time because she is. I tell her we don’t have to post the photos we take but she has this thing with having to share them on social media. I am also on the spectrum which may be an important detail, understanding these things is a little difficult for me, so I’m asking for advice here. I really want my mom to feel good about herself.
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Please adress your help to me. Me and my girlfriend, have been together for 2 years already, I really love her, but she's driving me insane and I don't know how to deal with it. she has always had some issues. Some of them are: 1) She always lies to me, small insignifiant lies all over the place and if I confront her, she always finds a way to justify why she did that and I can't even argue. 2) She never tells me about her problems. I have made my top priority making sure she's totally fine in all aspects of her life, but when I feel that something's CLEARLY off, that she seems sad or bothered by something, she never tells me and assures me everything's fine. No therapists help, she fools them into thinking that she just deals with minor stress. 3) She gets annoyed very quickly, wether it be me confronting her on something, or asking her something she would usually lie to me about.
please help guys I don't want to end this relationship, I want to fix it.
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2021.11.27 16:39 Juthse Compelling the writer in you, a soldier; when finding yourself in a dark, obscure, tarrying cloud.

Short story, focused on insecurities - personified, about careless decisions letting these personifications underrate, lampoon / mock us within hindering progress and thriving very real fears.
<> ''SIR!'' -the Lt was surveying the battlefield, eyes in a twist, binoculars steady. ''SIR!'' -you could hear the soldier shouting from beyond the cavernous tent, he'd probably had bypassed the guards and other personnel - what was left, and was simply in 'excitement' to do his duty. -the soldier almost fell entering the dark room, lit by the chaos-gray that seemed to seep in from rocky cutouts that would remind one of windows, if windows were grossly misshapen and fractured by the very minerals that forged them and the callous hands that primed them to broken, squared holes to see no-man's land, and beyond. ''What soldier?'' -the Lt never didn't look at the entrance, ever focused on what the binoculars displayed. The battle seemed to rage continuous, tremors shaking the very facet of the highest order, almost picturesque with the sky in clamor. -He remained calm, had to remain calm, mind tepid - away from the conflict, away from the prying eyes that would bring that trauma here, and he had to be strong, had to appear to be. ''Sir,'' a look of exhaustion tinged the poor man, but that didn't falter him from delivering the very news that had costed several others their lives for him to get here. ''We just received report-'' -the soldier seemed to struggle with the paper he held in hand. ''Well, spit it out man! No use in delaying news, come now.'' -the Lt's voice was a mix of a cold slap and a tug to guidance, the tired messenger blinked and continued. -the soldier seemed to eye the document in one hand, then eyed his superior officer. ''Sir, currently the neural network is being besieged by the outside factors, ''the insecurity'', and its not looking good, not looking good at al-'' ''Soldier!'' the Lt turned, saw the badge on the soldier's uniform and surmised, ''Corporal!'' -the corporal stood rigid, his weary eyes staying still at the sight of the commanding officer. ''What does the report fully say Corporal? Focus on the facts, not on the what may-be's or other hearsays.'' -he had to be firm, even thou the poor man, no less looking than his early 20's, looked to bear the full brunt of having seen evils about, evils that only conflict could bring, man against monster. -the Lt emphasized once more, his eyes cast a warm fortitude that the Corporal could pick up on. ''Go on Corporal, I'm listening. ''Yes sir, I'm sorry, the report says: To All Personnel;'' ''To All Personnel of The Frontal Lobe, Ventromedial Prefrontal Cortex (VPC) Company 4; Current Tactics suggest a retrieval of direct-action personnel, and an evacuation of all forces from the sector currently engaged..'' ''What-?'' the Lt could not hear this correctly. Where they to just abandon their gains, their hard work? -the Lt wondered who would take up their slack, and what would happen to the rest of the cortex. . . -the Corporal continued, reading each line as the Lt darkened in dreary fashion. ''Command has already taken steps to pronounce ''the insecurity'' as no need for further incursion, diminish the active 'alarm' pronounced in the system and to dampen all further actions, stated by current Amygdala-High Command as simply-'' -the Corporal inhaled, as this was the toughest part of the report. ''-to simply 'disengage, roll over, head left with closed eyes and cry in signs of laughter and willful abandon', sir. End report.'' -the Lt could not believe his ears. Months spent in campaign, with his units, his fellow officers, HIS-Friends, they'd given everything against the enemy. . . -they were down to auxiliary units to keep a full-bodied force running, but they'd continued, they held steadfast amid everything thrown at them- and now they were just, what? -abandon each parcel they'd come to reinforce by some fools in command... A pitiful gesture against the very anxiety they were fighting against? -to look the other way, to merely fret and wallow in self-pities, and allow the rest of the regions to falter and fall in chaos; they'd kill each other out of desperation, that is if not reigned or killed by the very ''insecurity''... . . . ''No.'' ''Sir?'' -the Lt took steady-forth, binocular cast aside for a more direct approach. -he moved with a purpose, the Corporal simply watched, hand still in clutch of the previous orders for the VPC Comp-4. -The Lt gathers his things, what was left - the few notions that mattered, the keepsakes that kept one going, those that belonged to the previous officers, his friends, family; the memories of those fallen in way and those yet to fall, he'd keep their memory alive, he'd *live*, and **continue the fight**, **for them**. ''No, we won't.'' He looked at the Corporal, battle dress in a worn state, rips in certain places, caked blood whether his or someone else's; he'd been through some fighting, just to bring this message to him. ''Corporal'', his voice held a stout ring, thou one would be naïve to think he didn't have his own fears, the Lt was full of them -made of the same material as any other soldier in this forsaken field; but as a leader of men and women, he'd proudly march along and forward! Damn His Orders, Damn Them! To hell with the lot of them! ! ''Corporal, here.'' -the corporal looked at his superior officer calmly produce a blank report piece, laid against the unfurnished, drooped yet still standing desk. He watched as the Lt wrote a few, precise, powerful words. ''Go back to the front, back to the fiercest part of the fighting, back to where ''this insecurity'' dwells, and let the Men and Women know: --' 'Keep To! Keep the steady forward, FORWARD! --' 'THOU THE TRIALS MAY BE ENDLESS, OUR VICTORY WE LAY TO IS EVEN MORE EVERLASTING! --' 'VICTORY TO THOSE WHO DARE, AND I SAY - WE, WE DO, WE DO DARE!' '-- -the corporal looked to the message, to its seal, and felt the honor bestowed on him to return to the nightmare, to return to the disquiet -but not in vain, not in defeatism; But with a prize greater than he, to move him-others-brothers and sisters-to a path unwinding. ''I trust this to you Corporal, defeat any in your way, and move, move with the very purpose we were set out to do!'' -The Lt held the note close to the Corporal, the Corporal's hand accepting - and clutched immediately by his superior officer's own. ''There is more to us, more to this infinitum that may seem, that may regard us all as insignificant, we may ponder and yonder when at our weakest, but that does not take away from our prevalence, our here and now that came from not just us, but others around us, pushing us, hand-in-hand.'' -The grip lessened, but not the lesson, not the orders, as if a sanctity held to the words to better seal the messenger's courage and spread forth. -The corporal nodded, firm now, spirited, and as he was walking out of the cavern's tent, he looked back, one final look at his Truly, Superior-Officer; ''Sir, what about you?'' -The Lt grabbed his cap, passing his hand onto his matted hair, parting away the curls with the firm placement of his officer's covered insignia. The mad lad, in a double reminder, lustered his stately composure with a smile. ''What else is an officer to do, but lead his men and women? Come Corporal,'' -he slung his rifle across his shoulder and holstered his equally powerful pen. ''We got history to write.'' <>
-You can continue the story if you desire. --Was the story precise in its objective? What did you feel? In what part did the story attract you the most? ---Critique. Constructive criticism first, praise second. Looking to better my abilities as a writer, thus keep admiration to a minimum. ----Discussion. Can you guess, as to the personifications and what they each represent?
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2021.11.27 16:39 pizzamonium Where have these been all my life!?

I decided I wanted to try something new so I got a steak quesadilla for the first time and my life has been changed. I got extra creamy jalapeño sauce because I like my food to be extra saucy and my life has been changed. I think this may be my new go to because my bean burrito and chips and cheese were getting boring.
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Is it really best to just let it go and not defend yourself??
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2021.11.27 16:39 H25azbxwyz Nigerian government rejects report on Lekki toll gate shooting as 'fake news'

(Source: CNN)
Watch the video in our channel:

Nigerian government rejects report on Lekki toll gate shooting as 'fake news'
Information Minister Lai Mohammed Tuesday said the panel's report, which was leaked and widely shared on social media last week, was "nothing but the triumph of fake news."
Speaking at a press conference in the nation's capital Abuja, Mohammed doubled down on the government's persistent denial of the Lekki shooting, saying: "That report is nothing but the triumph of fake news and the intimidation of a silent majority by a vociferous lynch mob."
He added that the minister's comment was improper coming at a time the country was still healing from the Lekki incident.
"Whatever it is that Alhaji Lai Mohammed had said at his press conference... is not the proper way that such an issue should be addressed in a nation that wants healing, justice and wants to win the trust of the public" Awosanya said, adding that "the panel worked objectively and surgically... towards ensuring that the truth and the facts are allowed to appear, and we gave our recommendations based on that."
"The report is not a public document. A leak or no leak shouldn't be the problem of the government... What matters to us is that we submitted hard copies to the government, and the government has promised to respond to it in two weeks through a white paper and make the same public. We wrote the report, we put it together and we have a consensus on it" he said.
The Judicial Panel of Inquiry and Restitution at the Lagos Court of Arbitration had documented in its year-long report that the shooting of young protesters who were protesting peacefully against alleged police brutality by Nigerian security forces at the Lekki toll gate, could be considered a "massacre."
US Secretary of State Anthony Blinken called for action once the panel's report has been released officially. "There may be reforms that are necessary" to ensure a simil(...)
Watch the video in our channel:
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View Poll
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2021.11.27 16:39 MelmothTheBee During my re-watch I liked then When Riley and Fr Paul talk…

During my re-watch I liked then When Riley and Fr Paul talk at the AA meeting they both talk about bad stuff that happens to good people. They touch on suffering etc.
What I particularly liked is that Fr Paul says that good come come from evil (because of God) and Riley immediately counters that bad stuff is just bad stuff even if hidden beyond “goodness”. They both come from their experience (Angel for Paul, the crash for Riley).
At the end of the series… they’re both right but for opposite reasons than what each of them thinks. Fr Paul wants to do good, for love, and does lots of good stuff (healing people, youth etc). Yet, evil and sufferings spawns from it. Riley is prompted by his terrible car accident to use suffering (his own death) to save an entire town if not the world.
In other words, they prove each other’s point.
Outstanding writing.
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